Let’s talk about socializing. More specifically, let’s talk about writers socializing. I know how easy it is to sequester myself when I write. I can develop my characters in my own little world, create one that fits my ideals. My characters do as I say.
But the problem with this is that the less we interact with real people, the less realistic are characters are bound to be. They begin to act like finger puppets, moving and speaking to the rhythm of your hands, typing away. But real people don’t do that. They will often surprise you, disagree with you, or downright betray you.
I find that no matter how well I think I know a person, they can still do and say things that I do not expect. If your character is as deep as a person, he/she will not like getting bossed around. Unless they’re the submissive type; in which case, you can pretty much beat them up as much as you like.
Try this one on for size: go to a party and watch different groups of strangers. Then go back home and invite your characters to a cocktail party. Do they react similarly to each other? Or does the whole thing go swimmingly, so to speak? You always hear of the strangest things happening at parties, from break-ups to break-dancing. If your characters have nothing to talk or complain about, you might need to do some character deepening.
The only cure I have found so far to cure this infection of deflating characters is to get together with people; they don’t even have to be my best friends, just people that I can observe and see how they interact with me and each other. Sometimes even just sitting in a coffee shop and people-watching (no stalking, please) can bring your characters a little more life.
Have you found this in your own writing? Do your characters tend to fall flat when you don’t interact with real people? What types of people do you like to watch?
9 responses to “Characters and Cocktails”
Kati Bartkowski's storysketches
April 5th, 2011 at 20:36
I do really like watching and listening to people at coffee shops to help with my writing. But I am worried sometimes about my characters becoming flat since I do tend to become antisocial when I’m working on my novels.
writer4G
April 15th, 2011 at 02:31
Thanks for your comment! I totally know what you mean though. I find that I can write some of my best material after hanging out with friends or groups of people. It’s easy enough to watch people, which fuels a lot of my characters (strangers act so funny sometimes, don’t they?), but actually talking with people is in some cases the most effective in finding out how a character actually thinks and acts. When attempting to form first-impression type writing however, watching is probably one of the most fun and interesting things to do. I highly enjoy it; plus, if I’m at a coffee shop, I can get Turtle lattes or something. 🙂
write4him96
April 6th, 2011 at 15:37
You’re right that we fit our characters to our boxes and so only put one perspective into our writing.
Coffee shop watching is one of the most interesting and informing activities for a writer. 🙂 Other good people-watching places are school libraries (I have gained a host of characters from mine.)
But I have found that just watching people doesn’t give us their perspectives as much as working with and for real people. As writers we want to have real people in our stories, facing real issues, and so we can’t be afraid to get our hands dirty with the problems of the world. Good experiences that will both be service and help us with authenticity in our writing are things like volunteering at a homeless shelter or soup kitchen, or doing “Meals on Wheels” (I believe they bring meals to elderly people who can’t get around much). Be with people, and you writing will definitely improve! 🙂
writer4G
April 15th, 2011 at 02:33
Thanks for your input! I totally agree. Hanging out with people, especially new people, is a great way to better understand a character. I do my best writing after hanging out with friends or groups of people. It’s a very good point. And to me, elderly people are just fascinating. I’d love to be able to sit down and talk to them more, especially when writing a historical piece. They have such interesting perspectives. What kinds of people do you interact with that you base your characters upon?
write4him96
April 20th, 2011 at 00:18
Well, it depends on the kind of characters. Often it is the people that are facing the biggestm hardest, or most painful circumstances; ie death of a family member, depression, addiction, etc. to base my characters on. When I observe how real people respond in real circumstances (whether they respond admirably or not) helps make my characters feel real.
Things Of Moderate Importance
April 8th, 2011 at 03:49
Love your thoughts! We like to imagine that our characters are something grander than real life, but come to realize that our characters are best when they are real life. I think you could delve even more into what we should be looking for when we observe people, I’d love to hear your thoughts on that. What has helped you speficically in observing people as aids in character formation?
writer4G
April 15th, 2011 at 02:38
I think observing people helps more with my first-impressions types of writing, where you as the reader meet a character for the first time, especially one that is still a mystery to the protagonist or even the narrator (depending on what type of narrator you are using). Some people just have really funny quirks that you can pick up on really fast that would make them a really memorable character.
I also think that we tend to make snap judgments of people that we only see and never interact with. These judgments can be good or bad, right or wrong, but what I think is important about this is that people can just have a certain feel about them, and first-impressions writing really needs to pick up on that feel. You can describe a person’s visible qualities as much as you want, but really trying to incorporate that feeling of comfort, awkwardness, concern, fright, or whatever else is really important for the reader to be able to visualize a character. I wouldn’t probably blatantly say that “he had a feel about him that made her feel uncomfortable,” per se, but using words to bring that emotion across is really fun to experiment with while watching strangers.
What are your thoughts?
amyovergaard
April 15th, 2011 at 05:21
I think it is so wise to look outside of your own box and experiences when writing and developing characters. It would be so boring to read the same character and plot over and over, and yet it doesn’t always seem natural to create someone that you can’t relate to.
Last spring I was at a conference and an author was talking about some of her characters, and she mentioned that no matter who they were or what they did, she had to find a way to love them. In that way she could figure out their motivation, even if it seemed completely foreign or repulsive to her. I like that idea mentioned above of “getting your hands dirty with the problems of the world.” As Christians, we shouldn’t shy away from those who have faced difficult things, but should walk alongside them through times of pain and trouble. As a writer this also proves a wonderful jumping-point to find someone or something completely new.
writer4G
April 19th, 2011 at 17:26
So true! Thanks for the tip. There are definitely times where I know I don’t love my characters–especially the evil ones, sometimes–and that’s kind of how I know they need some work to make them more realistic. The only caution I have with basing characters off of people who are struggling or going through hard times is to be sure you aren’t making it blatantly obvious that the character is that person. It’s not a good idea to be spreading around someone’s problems that they have entrusted to you. I know what you’re talking about, but I just thought I’d mention we have to be careful as writers not to take it too far.
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